I mean I guess I could try dressing as an actual member of society, instead of a disheveled, hungover swamp witch, but the question is why
Tag: me
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okay but this is a power move above any other
It gets even better, because he was doing all of this on a pitch black night. This dude swam towards a lure, slapped at it with his glove, and when it got caught; he let himself float and tugged on the line so the fisherman thought he had hooked a 100+ pound salmon. Once he was finally up to the shore, he turned a flashlight on in the guy’s face and walked out of the water, saying “good morning, gentlemen. State fish and game warden, you’re under arrest.“
At this point, the guy who had reeled him in had literally fallen over in shock, and the other people with him were scared shitless. The warden whipped some citations out of a plastic bag in his wetsuit, made the trespassers sign them, asked if they had any questions, and then gathered all of their fishing gear. And he just. Walked back into the river. And quietly swam away, without another word.
This man is a legend.
warden coming out of his river to shame fishermankind
me: is there anything i can do to make this outcome happen?
tarot cards: you’re depressed
me: yes i know
tarot cards: you feel unworthy
me: yes i know
tarot cards: you gotta keep going
me: please just answer the question
My favourite Irish insult is “Go ndéana an diabhal dréimire de chnámh do dhroma ag piocadh úll i ngairdín Ifrinn!”
Translation?
I hope the devil uses your backbone as a ladder to pick apple’s in the garden of hell
Holy shit Ireland are you ok
There’s also one that directly translates to :
May your friends have a fine day – burying you
That’s metal as fuck
http://transcriptWoman: He’s fine. He misses you.
Man: Give him my love.
Woman: Will do.
[woman looks at ridiculous oversized bird]
Woman: SQUAWK
Bird: SQUAWK
THE END
Good to know shitposting has been around since the inception of cinema
me, crouched down in front of my tomato plants, examining a pattern of insect bites on their lower leaves: i’m going to fucking kill whoever did this. i’m going to kill them for you. don’t worry, babies. I’m going to murder every single son of a bitch who ever got a mouthful of you. they’ll die screaming
my neighbor, who i did not realize was also outside, standing behind the fence: oh! okay. you’re talking to the plants. okay.
You: seeing six crows is bad luck and an omen of death
Me, an intellectual: seeing six crows is great luck because you get to see six crows
A representation of my thought process at all times
this is literally how teenagers talk irl
This literally sounds like a voice-acted recreation of a group chat
Things you can say in response to literally anything, when you have nothing else to say:
fruityrumpusassholefactorykarkat:
- As the prophecy foretold.
- But at what cost?
- So let it be written; so let it be done.
- So…it has come to this.
- That’s just what he/she/they would’ve said.
- Is this why fate brought us together?
- And thus, I die.
- …just like in my dream…
- Be that as it may, still may it be as it may be.
- There is no escape from destiny.
- Wise words by wise men write wise deeds in wise pen.
- In this economy?
- …and then the wolves came.
I’ve reblogged it before and I’ll reblog it again
teakepp 